Fans everywhere enjoy a good friendly, everyone enjoys giving into a good fantasy, and everyone loves the Fall - just too bad there isn't much Wiffle going on. Ah-ha! (Take on Me) That's where the the friendly and fantasy can come across even stronger. Four teams of five have been arbitrarily selected to compete and entertain us over the slow months. To determine the outcome of each at-bat a random number generator from 1 to 1000 is used. Each player's number ranges are different: their AVG and OBP are multiplied by the opposing pitcher's WHIP to set the ranges for hits and walks; from there a player's percentage of singles, doubles, triples, and home runs are spread over their "hit range": singles start at 1, home runs end at the highest number in the hit range. Walks follow above hits, and a pitcher's number of strikeouts in the 2012 season set the strikeout range after walks. Every number above that is an out made in the field: numbers closer to 1000 are fly outs, while lower numbers are ground outs. Depending on the situation sacrifice flies, advancing runners, peg outs, and double plays also come into play. You'll see that strikeouts and walks are disproportional to a real game, and that just adds to the entertainment! Let's just say everyone agreed to play these friendlies mid-pitch.

---

Game 6: 12 2 6 Curves (1-1)  VS.  Sinkers (2-0)

---

- The Curves make no lineup changes despite the loss. The team feels confident that the pieces laid out as they are - 1. Bischoff, 2. Buhr, 3. Nagorski, 4. Hewlett, 5. Coffman - will be more than good enough to win the Fall Championship with Evan Bischoff taking the mound (They did score 9 in the loss, with runs at the top and RBIs from the back end).

- Sinkers haven't played since 10/14 in a 17-15 shootout win over the Risers. Asked whether the layoff may hurt their production Phillips responded, "we got this." Then asked if Sinker's championship shirts will feature the slogan Hughes interupted, "will? Been wearing mine since September," as he lifted his jersey to show off a shirt reading "Sinkers, Fall Champions 2012, We always had this." No mention of their lineup, but they haven't changed anything yet. Why start now?

Top 1st
Buhr and Hewlett reach base on a single and walk, but they come sandwiched between two ground outs and a fly out. Curves unable to get anything going against Phillips in the first.

Bot 1st
Easy inning to start the day for Bischoff: two outs on the ground and a lazy pop out. Score is 0-0 after one.

Top 2nd
Two one-out singles (Buhr, Nagorski) and a walk (Hewlett) get a threat going for the Curves. A fielders choice by Coffman keeps the bases loaded with two outs for Bischoff, who makes up for his K earlier in the inning with a 2 RBI double to right-center. Buhr follows with his third hit of the game, a single scoring both Coffman and Bischoff. The inning ends on a Nagorski fly out to left, but four runs in for the Curves.

Bot 2nd
Hewlett robs a home run off the bat of Phillips on the first pitch of the inning. The deep fly shakes Bischoff up, and he walks the next two batters. He settles back down, getting Braden and Alexia on more routine fly outs. 4-0 Curves after two innings.

Top 3rd
Cleansing inning in the third for Phillips with help from Alexia and Hughes turning a double play (SS - 2nd - mound) on Coffman after a Hewlett walk. Bischoff then slaps a single to left, but nothing comes of it as Buhr flies out to Roszell in center. Sinkers quiet the opponents bats, but need to wake theirs up to get in this championship deciding game.

Bot 3rd
Two more walks (Phillips, Braden) by Bischoff, but he gets the other three batters out on fielder's choices. No harm, no foul... and no hits given up yet on the day. Score remains 4-0 Curves.

Top 4th
Three up, three down for the Curves in the fourth. They make it a busy inning for Roszell chasing down fly balls in left, but nothing else. Still comfortable in command of the game, though.

Bot 4th
That comfortable feeling gets a little less as Phillips hits a hard drive to left to lead off an inning for the second time, and this time out of the reach of Hewlett. Solo home run. Bischoff seems to shake off this hard hit quicker getting the next two batters out in the air then on the ground. Braden then steps up and crushes another ball deep to left and over the wall. Second solo home run of the inning. Alexia grounds out to finish the inning, but the Sinkers get on the board and back into this game. They still trail the Curves 4-2 with one inning left to play.

Top 5th
After that scare, the Curves look to add some insurance with the top of the order due up. Bischoff steps up with a single, and Buhr hits a one-hopper to Alexia in short left that he handles for the first out (FC 2nd). Phillips then kicks it up a notch needing just two pitches K to Nagorski, get Hewlett to pop out to right and end the inning. Curves hold onto their two run lead needing just three more outs to win the Fall Championship.

Bot 5th
Bischoff walks Phillips, then trades out runners on the next two batters with fielder's choices to the circle: both out at second. One out left to get, but Braden keeps the Sinkers alive with a single to left. Alexia draws a walk, bringing Phillips back up to the plate. He draws his second walk of the inning, pushing Hughes across the plate. Tying run standing at third, two outs. Roszell slaps the ball into right, Buhr charges in and flips the ball to Bischoff for the final out! 12 2 6 Curves hang on and win the Fall Championship in exciting fashion 4-3!

	1	2	3	4	5	R	H
	0	4	0	0	0	4	7
	0	0	0	2	1	3	3

12 2 6 Curves  (2-1)			Sinkers  (2-1)
OFFENSE			OFFENSE
E. Bischoff	3-5, 2B, 2 RBI, R		Hughes	0-4, BB, R
Buhr	3-5, 2 RBI		D. Braden	2-4, HR, BB, RBI, R
Nagorski	1-4, R		Alexia	0-4, BB
Hewlett	0-2, 3 BB		Phillips	1-2, HR, 3 BB, 2 RBI, R
Coffman	0-4, R		Roszell	0-4, BB
PITCHING			PITCHING
E. Bischoff	3 R, 3 H, 2 HR, 7 BB		Phillips	4 R, 7 H, 3 BB

Standings
	W	L	+/-
	2	1	-1
	2	1	+2
	1	2	-1
	1	2	0

The 2012 Fall Fantasy season comes to a rousing close. The 12 2 6 Curves took advantage of the Sinkers' cockiness and jumped out quickly to a 4-0 lead. It was big hits by E. Bischoff and Buhr in the top two spots that pushed in the runs, and that's just what they did all fall long. A classic 1-2 duo, combined to hit .517 with a .576 OBP. Their power numbers were modest, though they did hit four doubles: more than the rest of the league combined. It was the entire team getting into the act, though, to get the win with numbers 3, 4, and 5 - Nagorski, Hewlett, and Coffman - coming around to score those big early runs.

Bischoff had an off night giving up 7 walks and 2 home runs, while getting no strike outs. Luckily his defense played a great game behind him to allow only 3 hits to a powerful Sinkers offense. Even with two players vying for the triple crown, said offense showed no real life until the fourth inning. True, Phillips did have a home run robbed in the second, but taken with the rest of the Sinkers' ABs on the day, it seemed more like hitting for the home run crown than to win the game. A flat performance by the favorites, but they get to go out on fire regardless; those shirts they had made are in need of burning.

Player stats and awards for the Fall Fantasy season to come at the end of the week.

Fans everywhere enjoy a good friendly, everyone enjoys giving into a good fantasy, and everyone loves the Fall - just too bad there isn't much Wiffle going on. Ah-ha! (Take on Me) That's where the the friendly and fantasy can come across even stronger. Four teams of five have been arbitrarily selected to compete and entertain us over the slow months. To determine the outcome of each at-bat a random number generator from 1 to 1000 is used. Each player's number ranges are different: their AVG and OBP are multiplied by the opposing pitcher's WHIP to set the ranges for hits and walks; from there a player's percentage of singles, doubles, triples, and home runs are spread over their "hit range": singles start at 1, home runs end at the highest number in the hit range. Walks follow above hits, and a pitcher's number of strikeouts in the 2012 season set the strikeout range after walks. Every number above that is an out made in the field: numbers closer to 1000 are fly outs, while lower numbers are ground outs. Depending on the situation sacrifice flies, advancing runners, peg outs, and double plays also come into play. You'll see that strikeouts and walks are disproportional to a real game, and that just adds to the entertainment! Let's just say everyone agreed to play these friendlies mid-pitch.

---

Game 4: Cheese (0-1)  VS.  12 2 6 Curves (1-0)

---

- Following their 7-6 defeat in Game 1, the Cheese make a few lineup shifts to get the most out of their offense. Crozier (2-4, BB) bumps up to the lead off spot, followed by Shore (1-5) who brings a lot of extra base power. Lewis (2-4) takes over the three-hole, with Pfefferle (2-4, HR) backing him up, and Cosby rounding out the order. Lewis gets the start.

- The 12 2 6 Curves make only one change in their lineup: bumping Buhr (2-3, 2 BB) up to the two spot. Evan Bischoff (3-6, 2 2B) stays at lead off, and Nagorski (3-6, HR) moves down to third in the order to put him in position to best do damage with another home run. Hewlett and Coffman remain in the four and five slots. Hewlett is on the mound.

Top 1st -
Crozier leads off the game with a shot into left-center for a single. Shore just misses on a 3-1 pitch, flying out to Buhr in right. Lewis puts a ball on the ground to Bischoff in left, who gets the ball to the circle for the out at first; Crozier safe at second, two outs. Pfefferle draws a walk, then Cosby rolls over a pitch and grounds out to left.

Bot 1st -
Bischoff starts things off for the Curves with a line drive directly at Shore in left for out number one. Buhr then puts a ball on the ground the other way, but Cosby charges and flips to the pitcher in time for the second out. A routine ground ball out off the bat of Nagorski ends the inning. 0-0 after one.


Cheese scoresheet Top 2nd -
Hewlett makes quick work of the Cheese in the second, throwing just 8 pitches. Crozier grounds out to Bischoff in left on the second pitch he sees, Shore sees three pitches and drives a single to right, Lewis then pops up the first pitch back to the mound, and Pfefferle fouls off a good first pitch then hits a high fly to Nagorski in center to end the inning.

Bot 2nd -
Hewlett draws a walk to start the inning, then Coffman pops out behind the pitcher's circle. Bischoff hits another ball hard to left, this time for a single; runners on first and second. Buhr puts a ball on the ground to left-center, Crozier charges to his right and makes the throw to the circle for the out at third. Nagorski puts a ball down the left-field line, Shore gets to it in time to hold him to a single and Buhr at second. However, Bischoff scores from second. Hewlett then walks for the second time in the inning, loading the bases. Coffman puts the ball in play, and Cosby makes the catch in right to retire the side. Curves take a 1-0 lead after two.

Top 3rd -
The Curves run wakes up the Cheese offense, and fiercely! After a Cosby ground out, Crozier singles to center, Shore and Lewis draw walks to load the bases, then Pfefferle ropes a single into right-center that scores Crozier and Shore from second. Cosby walks to load the bases for the top of the order, and Crozier drops a single between Nagorski and Buhr to score Lewis; bases remain loaded. Shore works the count, fouls off four tough pitches, and eventually draws his second walk of the inning; this one pushing Pfefferle across the plate. Lewis follows slapping the ball into right field, Bischoff whips his throw to the circle in time to get Cosby at home; two out. Pfefferle connects on a high pitch, and hits it deep to right field; Buhr camps under it and shudders the flood gates. 4 runs cross the plate, Cheese take a 4-1 lead.


12 2 6 Curves scoresheet Bot 3rd -
Bischoff leads off the third with a long battle, drawing a walk, and Buhr follows with an infield single; a charging Shore holds the ball at third to not throw it away. The play looks smart as Nagorski trickles a ball just past the 20' dead-ball line for another infield single, but cannot push across a run. With the bases loaded Hewlett hits a single to right, Bischoff scores, Buhr rounds third and tries to score; Cosby throws a relay to Lewis in front of the plate, but they miss the peg; two runs score and Nagorski moves up to third on the throw. On the first pitch Coffman hits a ball on the ground to left; Shore throws to Crozier at second and he attempts to turn the double play in the circle, but the throw is just late. RBI for Coffman on the fielder's choice at second. Bischoff then knocks a ball over Lewis' head into short center; Crozier charges, tags the bag, and whips the ball to Lewis for the double play to end the inning. Curves add 3 to bring things back even at 4 heading into the fourth.

Top 4th -
Just as in the third, the Cheese offense responds furiously. Cosby leads off by crushing a 2-0 fastball over the fence in left. Three consecutive singles by the top of the order push across a second run, with Shore advancing to third on Lewis' flare to right. The Curves catch a break turning a double play (left-second-circle) on Pfefferle; Shore scores from third on the play for the third run of the innings, bases empty. Cosby keeps things going with a single to center, and Crozier belts a deep drive over the wall in right-center; the second home run of the inning and fourth and fifth runs. Swinging on the first pitch Shore nearly adds to both those numbers, but has a home run taken away by Buhr in right. Big inning for the Cheese puts them up 9-4 just six outs away from a win.

Bot 4th -
It took until the fourth inning, but this is what the Curves' lineup shift was meant to do. Buhr gets on with a single, then Nagorski knocks the ball over the fence in left-center. Lewis rebounds with his first strike out and a ground out, before Bischoff knocks a ball into right for a single. Lewis tidies up quickly getting Buhr to fly out to Shore in left. Curves chip away at the lead with 2 runs, still trail 9-6 as we go to the fifth.

Top 5th -
Hewlett has his best inning since the second. He opens up dealing his first strike out of the day against his counterpart, Lewis. Pfefferle dribbles an infield single, followed by a seeing eye variety off the bat of Cosby. Hewlett then gets Crozier to weekly fly out to Nagorski in center, runners hold, and bookends the inning with a swinging strikeout by Shore. Last call for the Curves needing 3 runs.

Bot 5th -
Lewis looks locked in to close the game down. He gets Nagorski out on a weak pop up to Pfefferle, and Hewlett on a slow roller to Shore. Coffman then gets to him with a single down the left field line, and Bischoff follows with a walk to bring the tying run to the plate. Buhr puts a nice swing on Lewis' patented riser, but drives it to the deep part of the park in center. Crozier gets underneath of it and records the final out. 9-6 Cheese win!

	1	2	3	4	5	R	H
	0	0	4	5	0	9	13
	0	1	3	2	0	6	9

Cheese  (1-1)			12 2 6 Curves  (1-1)
OFFENSE			OFFENSE
Crozier	5-7, HR, 3 RBI, 3 R		E. Bischoff	2-4, 2 BB, 2 R
Shore	2-5, 2 BB, RBI, 2 R		Buhr	2-6, 2 R
Lewis	1-5, BB, RBI, R		Nagorski	3-5, HR, 3 RBI, 2 R
Pfefferle	2-5, BB, 2 RBI, R		Hewlett	1-3, 2 BB, 2 RBI
Cosby	2-4, HR, BB, RBI, 2 R		Coffman	1-5, RBI
PITCHING			PITCHING
Lewis	6 R, 9 H, 1 HR, 4 BB, 1 K		Hewlett	9 R, 13 H, 2 HR, 5 BB, 2 K

Standings
	W	L	+/-
	2	0	+3
	1	1	+2
	1	1	-2
	0	2	-3

The lineup changes for both teams were successful at boosting offensive production to the tune of three more runs for the Cheese and one more for the Curves. Though, obviously, those results are more apparent for the Cheese. Crozier thrived in the move to the lead-off spot: going 5-7 (now hitting .637 this Fall), getting his first HR and first 3 RBI, as well as scoring 3 more runs for 5 on the Fall. Pfefferle had his second two-hit game and added his fifth and sixth RBI of the Fall. Cosby also had his second two-hit game, getting his first HR and RBI, expertly fitting into the five slot. Nagorski had another great game for the Curves: his second three-hit game of the Fall (hitting .545), second HR and third, fourth, and fifth RBIs.

At 1-1 both teams are still in the hunt for the Fall Championship with just two games left to play. The Cheese close out their season against the 0-2 Risers, and the Curves go head-to-head with the 2-0 Sinkers. Both games have implications on crowning the champion. The cleanest way to decide the champion is A) a Sinkers victory; at 3-0 they would stand alone with no need for any tie-breakers. A 1-2 Curves team would finish third with a loss to the Cheese and win over the Risers. However, a Curves victory in that game makes things much more interesting. B) A Curves win and a Cheese win makes three teams 2-1, each with a head-to-head win over one of the others: Cheese over Curves, Curves over Sinkers, Sinkers over Cheese. Therefore the champion - as well as second and third place - would be crowned by run differential.* C) A Curves win and a Cheese loss makes the Curves the outright champion with their victory over the only other 2-1 team, Sinkers - Sinkers would be second, Risers third, and Cheese fourth.

Bottom line on what's at stake in these final two games: Sinkers and Curves can finish anywhere from first to third; Risers can still place as high as second; and Cheese can finish anywhere on the board - first to last! #MeaningfulGamesInOctober

* On the other end of the spectrum, a loss by both the Cheese and Curves puts three teams at 1-2 and will see second through fourth place decided by run differential.

Fans everywhere enjoy a good friendly, everyone enjoys giving into a good fantasy, and everyone loves the Fall - just too bad there isn't much Wiffle going on. Ah-ha! (Take on Me) That's where the the friendly and fantasy can come across even stronger. Four teams of five have been arbitrarily selected to compete and entertain us over the slow months. To determine the outcome of each at-bat a random number generator from 1 to 1000 is used. Each player's number ranges are different: their AVG and OBP are multiplied by the opposing pitcher's WHIP to set the ranges for hits and walks; from there a player's percentage of singles, doubles, triples, and home runs are spread over their "hit range": singles start at 1, home runs end at the highest number in the hit range. Walks follow above hits, and a pitcher's number of strikeouts in the 2012 season set the strikeout range after walks. Every number above that is an out made in the field: numbers closer to 1000 are fly outs, while lower numbers are ground outs. Depending on the situation sacrifice flies, advancing runners, peg outs, and double plays also come into play. You'll see that strikeouts and walks are disproportional to a real game, and that just adds to the entertainment! Let's just say everyone agreed to play these friendlies mid-pitch.

---

Game 2: 12 2 6 Curves  VS.  Risers

---

Top 1st -
Easy first inning for Evan Bischoff and the Curves. Routine fly outs to center and left field, followed by a ground out to left.


Bot 1st -
Nagorski is able to reach on a single, but Constanti keeps the rest of the Curves off the basepaths with two ground outs and a fly out. 0-0 after 1 inning.

Top 2nd -
Bischoff continues rolling for the Curves with two ground outs and his first strike out of the day.

Bot 2nd -
Constanti responds strongly to start with a quick ground out and his first strike out for the Risers. Nagorski then tags him for a long solo home run to left center, which seems to shake him for the next couple batters: a double to right field by Buhr and a walk to Hewlett. Constanti regains his composure and gets Coffman to pop out to short to end the inning. 1-0 Curves after 2.

Top 3rd -
Greg Franzen draws a walk to lead off the inning, giving the Risers their first base runner of the day. Bischoff quickly rebounded, though, striking out Seto and getting Contanti and Mushinski to ground into outs. Perfect game lost, but Curves lead remains 1-0.

Bot 3rd -
A slightly scary inning for the Risers, but ultimately harmless. Deep flies off the bats of Bischoff and Nagorski both came up short of the fence in left-center, before a walk to Buhr. Hewlett again put the ball in the air, easily caught in short center to end the inning. Curves still lead 1-0.

Top 4th -
Bischoff continues cutting down the Risers hitters by allowing his defense to make the outs. Two fly outs to Nagorski in center field, and a routine ground out to Hewlett at short make for an easy inning.

Bot 4th -
Coffman draws a walk to lead off, followed by a first-pitch single by Bischoff. Nagorski's able to get the ball in play, but a short fly ball to left: unable to advance the runners. Buhr then walks to load the bases. Hewlett steps up and grounds a ball straight to the pitcher; out made at home, bases remian loaded. Coffman strikes out on a slider low and away to end the threat. Score remains 1-0 Curves, last call for the Risers.

Top 5th -
Bischoff starts out strong, striking out Constanti. He then walks Mushinski, putting the tying run on for Tomlinson who singles to left field: runners on first and second with Franzen stepping up the plate. 0-2 with a BB on the day, Franzen turned on a high and tight fastball and put it ten feet over the left field wall to awaken the Risers' bench. Seto followed with a seven-pitch walk, before Constanti delivered a dribbling single to right - advancing Seto to third. Mushinski then hit a fly ball to center that scored Seto from third. Tomlinson followed with another deep drive, but came up just short to end the inning. However, Risers claim the lead, 4-1, with the top of the Curves order due up.

Bot 5th -
Evan Bischoff leads off with a double to the right-center gap. Nagorski then flies out to right, advancing Bischoff to third on the tag. Buhr lines a single into left to score the run and keep the Curves hopes alive. Hewlett then fouls off a few good pitches, puts together a good at bat and draws a walk, putting the tying run on base. Coffman comes through, driving a single up the middle; Hewlett comes around to score, runners on first and second. Lead cut to 4-3. Bischoff then a rips a double to left-center; Hewlett scores easily from second to tie the game, and with one out the Curves hold Coffman at third. The safe play pays off as Nagorski rips a single back up the middle to score the fourth run of the inning and the game winner. Curves win 5-4 in walk-off fashion!

	1	2	3	4	5	R	H
	0	0	0	0	4	4	3
	0	1	0	0	4	5	9

Risers  (0-1)			12 2 6 Curves  (1-0)
OFFENSE			OFFENSE
Tomlinson	1-5, R		E. Bischoff	3-6, 2 2B, RBI, R
Franzen	1-3, BB, HR, 3 RBI, R		Nagorski	3-6, HR, 2 RBI, R
Seto	0-3, BB, R		Buhr	2-3, 2 BB, 2B, RBI, R
Constanti	1-4		Hewlett	0-3, 2 BB, R
Mushinski	0-2, BB, RBI, R		Coffman	1-4, BB, RBI, R
PITCHING			PITCHING
Constanti	5 R, 9 H, HR, 5 BB, 2 K		E. Bischoff	4 R, 3 H, HR, 3 BB, 3 K

In the Cards '12 #3: Josh Nagorski

In the Cards '12  #3:  Josh Nagorski
Thunder Ducks

Josh Nagorski lives in the shadows, figuratively, and he has no shadow, literally. He lost it in a game of RoShamBo with Peter Pan; although, admittedly Josh should have recognized Pan would pull scissors. Josh is not bothered by the missing shadow as it makes stealth much easier, thus assisting in his ninja training. It has put a quick stop to his highly entertaining puppet theater side-show, however. None of that is here nor there, though, so back to living figuratively in the shadows.

That is a consequence of playing on a team with the D & D boys. Dennis' cannon and Dylan's boomstick are a gravity well for commentary and awe, and the big news from the team in the offseason was the signing of Lewis. Therefore, much of what Gorski brings to the team goes unnoticed around the league. This is in harmony with his ninja persona, however, and he is able to get the jump on unsuspecting pitchers.

It may surprise many that Naggie has actually taken over much of the Thunder Duck operations. He is the one who spearheaded the renaming of the team, for one. Many scheduling requests are funneled through him, for two. He also made the finishing touches to his 00 on the outfield wall at The Swamp. The Ducks have since started the tradition of caressing and pinching them after wins; the MVP finishes off the celebration with some motorboat action.

Oh yeah, and in addition to all of that Gorski can play a little ball! This season, in fewer at bats, Josh has already surpassed his extra-base hits from 2011, including getting his first home run, and has matched his BB and RBI totals from the prior season. He is trending toward the clutch-hitter that he was during last year's playoffs. His AVG may be a bit down, but at .286 is second best on the reigning champion roster, and he is tied for their hit lead with eight. His SLG% is .113 higher than he has ever hit before, which shows he is developing as a Wiffleball hitter and figuring out opposing pitchers. If he settles into this trend as a player, he will be out of the shadows soon and making noise for years to come.

Season	AB	H	BB	R	2B	HR	RBI	AVG	OBP	SLG
2012 to date	28	8	5	5	2	1	3	.286	.394	.464
2011	37	12	5	6	1	0	3	.324	.395	.351
2011 playoffs	46	14	0	1	1	0	3	.304	.304	.326

Under the Radar: 4 Players Who Might Sneak Up On You

		Your Junk my Happy Zone
		by Brandon Corbett

Spring is the time to not only get back your feel for the game, but also the time to check out the new talent, improvements made in a returning player's game, size up the league, and make predictions about what is coming up this season. Going into our second year, we have approximately fifty returning players we think we know a good deal about. We also have a large rookie class entering the league. With all this talent running around, there are some players left to fly under the radar. These are four players whom I think will use that element of stealth to their advantage.

Craig Spring  -  Manchester Punchouts To be fair, the entire Punchouts roster are only rookies in relation to WSEM. However, we all know about the pitching and hitting talents of players like Evan Bortmas and Sam Hatt. They along with another previous-unknown, Logan Zigila (aka "Godzilla", aka "the Silver Surfer", aka "Wolverine") and his monstrous power at the plate are taking the light away from what Spring brings to the team: Craig brings that extra base power, too, but he also brings lightning-quick speed. If the ball gets past the pitcher, he has a good shot of reaching first base safely. His speed also helps him make great, wide-ranging plays in the field; including coverage of a large swath of foul territory. On a team full of "rookie" players already receiving a lot of praise, Craig is poised to take the league by storm.

Adam Cosby  -  Jason Mattseals Some of us have experienced what the new Mattseals ace brings to the mound, but most of the league has no idea about him and thinks of Hewlett as the crown jewel of the 'Seals roster. Soon, however, everyone will learn how much they are missing when they see Cosby pitch. One thing that may help keep Cosby's cross-section low is the amount of talent spread across the other new Mattseals' pick-ups: the bat of Mike Myers or Greg Franzen's managing, for example. In his first competitive Wiffleball games, though, Adam easily handled Wiffleball veterans with his assortment of pitches. He is not a dead-to-rights fireballer, but he does have respectable velocity. Adam also pairs that velocity with good movement and deception. Oh, yeah, he brings a good stick to the other side of the plate, too.

David Castle  -  Belgian Wiffles Taking stealth to a new level: this is the highest quality shot we have of David! (Sorry, David, we will get a better one soon.) The serious reason why Castle is flying below the radar in buzz around the league, though, is that his fellow Belgian rookie, Chandler Philips, is already being sized up as a Diamond Digit winner waiting to happen. Nick Walker is also the most recognized name and face of the new Belgian roster. Thus, Castle was quietly able to go about throwing a gem in the innings he pitched against the Thunder Ducks during the satellite tournament. David is confident and impressive on the mound, and gave his team the opportunity to go up 3-0 against the reigning champions in his first Wiffleball start. He is definitely going to be talked-up much more as this season advances and he racks up innings.

Josh Nagorski  -  Thunder Ducks Josh is another victim, or benefactor (depending on your outlook), of playing with teammates who steal the spotlight. Obviously the NWLA Strike-out King and Clown Shu winner, Dennis Pearson, commands a lot of attention. As does the acquisition of Dr. Riser, Chris Lewis, as number-two pitcher in he off-season. Nagorski has thus been improving his game in the shadows. You may have missed it, since your team had been knocked out, but Josh's batting average blew up in last year's playoffs: a stout .304, which was third best among players with more than two games played. He put that number up in seven games, while he only saw action in eight games during the regular season. "Naggie" expects to feature much more regularly in the 2012 Thunder Ducks lineup, and I expect we will see his numbers continue to grow steadily alongside his appearances.

Off-season Training Regimens

		Your Junk my Happy Zone
		by Brandon Corbett

Everybody trains in the off-season. Okay, that is not true. Many of us probably have joined hippie colonies in order to avoid touching plastic since September. I did not touch a bat or ball until the couple days of pick-up games we have played. The off-season, for me, is the time to have the real fun with this game: make ridiculous side-project websites, do increasingly ridiculous podcasts, and let the crazy fly! The Wiffle community is crazy! Learn to love that! Still, some do take the down time to enhance their skills in the game: batting practice, pitching the snow pitching in a garage (it did not snow this year), running stairs, math and science. Then there are people who take training to a whole new level; techniques so advanced that you know they are poised to take over the league. The following are a few of those wonderful men.



Mike Merlo (P, Flying Squirrels) has the honored status of "old guy sturdy veteran" in WSEM. Fittingly, in accordance with the age-appropriate tendency to say things like, "in my day we used to walk up-hill both ways to and from school," Mike actually went through the expense and filed all the zoning paperwork to bring "his day" back today! What Merlo did was engineer a system that adjusts the altitude of both his home and workplace, changing the plane between them so that it can always be set to an incline. Genius! Nobody has told him, however, that since he drives to work he is not actually doing more work himself.





Josh Nagorski (OF, Thunder Ducks) wants to become a defensive star and perennial winner of one of the Diamond Digit awards. Nagorski also knew of the phrase "hot hand", so he devised a way to always ensure himself of having that hot hand: use ice cream to practice throwing. On one hand (no pun intended), digging into the bulk-size container of the frozen stuff and balling it up quickly improved his dexterity and "ball" control. He realized almost instantly, though, that even with the grip on the cold mass it was still too easy to hit a stationary target; he would need to find moving targets to simulate a game situation. It was on his next trip to the freezer section of the grocery store that he realized the perfect solution: train right there in the frozen foods aisle! With plenty of ice cream at hand and a steady stream of people passing by, Josh had an efficient means to hone his skills. Later, after being questioned by police - most likely to learn how to improve their softball squads - when the handcuffs were removed Josh realized the success of his training: his hands had never felt so hot!





New to the game of Wiffleball, Rich Hurd (C, King Friday) has been avidly watching as much tape on the sport as he can. His real irregular training began during his seventh watch-through of "The Bird: Give it to 'Em", WSEM's video highlighting pitchers, though. While trying to incorporate the styles he saw in the video into his beer pong game, Rich realized that not only was it getting him nowhere with Wiffle, but it was also negatively affecting his beer pong form. After finishing off the eighth, ninth and tenth cups, he took a break and scrolled through other "suggested videos" that might be of help. It was by accident that a Bars of Gold video was selected initially, being the band featured in "The Bird". However, that happy accident led Hurd down a trail of ever-more enticing videos about real bars of gold. Time-skip two months forward: Rich along with a cheeky local trail-guide and a Saigon whore are Indiana Jones-ing it up, trekking through jungles in search of the lost bars. Hurd's goal: well... nobody really knows how it relates to Wiffleball. But who cares?! He is going to be filthy rich! (No pun intended.) Besides, tangling with snakes, jungle cats, aborigines, and ancient booby traps is sure to hone skills relating to everything.





You may have seen this one on late night television alongside other famous infomercials, as it has become a championed training exercise. Joe Spagnuolo (OF, Donkeys) had an epiphany one night while looking forward to the 2012 Wiffle season: "if I can hit a brick, I can hit Dennis Pearson!"; the sort of advice that a bizarro Rip Torn might give. Taking heed to the sage advice, Joe promptly set a brick on a tee and started taking swing after increasingly aggressive swing with the plastic bat. Eventually, after a mere seventy-four hopelessly misshapen bats, Joe began to move the brick impressive distances away from the tee: eight, maybe nine feet! Spags knew he was onto something, but was it enough? Better to be safe than sorry, he evolved the setup: hit a swinging brick. Eighty-six snapped-in-half bats later he was connecting with enough force to break the string suspending the weight and flip it a few feet forward. He had done it. Joe knew he could now handle an 85 mph plastic ball, no problem. With that came the Spags Power Smash Swing, and infomercial stardom!

Walk-up Music 2012: Vol. 1

		Your Junk my Happy Zone
		by Brandon Corbett

Walk-up themes! Mmmm, yeah! Let's get sexy! This year I am going to put these out in small doses, like a series of EPs throughout the year. Remember what the thought behind this is: first, an amusing anecdote about the player to hopefully get a chuckle, then - only as an accidental afterthought - the "cool" factor you would normally go for with a walk-up theme. Come to think of it, that's kind of the thought behind Wiffle all the time. Get excited, because here we go!


"I'll Tumble 4 Ya"  - Culture Club -  Jason Matt  -  Jason Mattseals



Jason is no stranger to laying out for pop flies, whether he's tracking back towards the wall or sprawling off the mound. And sometimes his eyes reach a little further than his arms, or body. Nevertheless, if he has any shot at the ball at all, Jason will tumble for ya!



"Ace is in the House"  - Tone Loc -  Mike Constanti  -  Flying Squirrels



Ever since his new captain gave him the number-one starter job with the Squirrels, reports have frequently come in of Mike traveling from club to club with an entourage that belts out "yo' ace is in the house" with each ever-more grandiose entrance. We don't expect a lowly boombox; we expect a DJ and full-on dance routine!



"Rollin' with Kid N' Play"  - Kid N' Play -  Josh Nagorski  -  Thunder Ducks



According to commissioner Coffee, Josh is a kid. According to his 2011 playoffs, Nagorski can play. He's willing to laugh off the former, especially if the low-light of the "kid" nickname can help prove the latter to his neasayers.



"Escape from Ohio"  - Electric Six -  Eric Pfefferle  -  Campus Commandos



Eric lives in Perrysburg, OH. Let's just say it; no ifs, ands, or buts... having us to get him the heck out of there is the best thing "Pfeiffer" has going on!



"I Know What I Like (In Your Wardrobe)"  - Genesis -  BJ Hoppe  -  Wiffling DeLoppes



BJ comes to the park dressed for the big time: home white pants, road grey pants, always high-cuffed; the only way to wear your baseball pants. Sure, he could rock a song like "Sharp Dressed Man", but BJ's style is unique on the Wiffle diamond, and all you can say is, "he knows what he likes." Or that Petey G. fits better than the beards.