In the Cards #4: Bobby Hoppe

In the Cards #4: Bobby Hoppe
Wiffling DeLoppes

Bobby's found his number! [ref.: see #3] The DeLoppes third and newest jersey style this year finally sees Bobby's rightful number 96 emblazoned across his back, bold in black. His number's not the only thing Bobby Hoppe has found this year, either: he's found his bat! In a big way.

Before this season it could not have been easy for Bobby scrapping in the shadows behind the likes of his brother Chad and Joey DeLano on the DeLoppes. Onlookers would often see only those two, associate the "DeL" and "oppes" to their last names, and only later realize there were "other Hoppes" on the team. This disrespect seems to have sent Bobby on a quest in the offseason to earn his face time and a prominent position on this team. He embarked with a supply of medicinal herbs, wearing his signature red Titleist cap, map in hand and pointed himself in the direction of "Wiffle Mecca," which conveniently followed a route featuring many Chinese buffets. He has never shown the map to anyone, and many believe he found other use for it while on the journey.

We can however safely assume a few things about what it contained. It almost certainly seldom made use of the letter 'K' or 'O.' Instead using 'R,' 'B,' and 'I,' as well as 'H' and 'R' in place of those. Numbers bigger than one must also have been included en masse: 2s and 3s specifically; unless Bobby just trained by ritually double or triple folding the map between the times he's rumored to have torn and rolled pieces of it. Lastly, not about the physical map itself, but he must have carried it in a long plastic container the same size, shape, and weight of a wiffle bat to allow Bobby to become so well acquainted with how to effectively use the real thing.

How far did Bobby trek to reach "Wiffle Mecca?" What did he find when he got there? Did he get ever get there, or is the idea of "Wiffle Mecca" just the drive for a player to make themself better and obtain that new level through their journeyman training? ... Shit. This is getting philosophical. There's no time for that in wiffleball... Unless a philosophy that works is what Bobby learned, a steady and centered consciousness on the field: see ball, smash ball, flash a confident smile, pick cigarette back up, and repeat. Wherever his journey took him, whatever was waiting for him at the end underneath the 'X': it worked. Bobby has come out in 2011 as a whole new ballplayer, playing a huge part in his team's success. He is ripping the ball harder, for better average, and coming through in clutch situations. He has found his bat, and damnit has he earned his number 96! So, with that, here are a few more numbers for Bobby:

Bobby's 2011 stats (as of June 16th) to complete the card treatment:

Player	PA	AB	H	BB	HR	RS	AVG	OBP	SLG	RBI
Bobby Hoppe	57	47	18	10	2	10	.383	.491	.617	19